Naturally, derision from the young is the only possible result.

Something not entirely dissimilar also applies to the highly complex nature of footy jargon. If you aren't monitoring the commentators constantly, don't expect to be able to keep up with cutting-edge practice in a fortnight's time.

"Structure" is a particularly bamboozling concept, not the least because it seems to have a chameleon-like tendency to change meaning with the person using the term.

Brian Taylor, during Essendon v Gold Coast, was attracted to the significance of "structure around the stoppage". This seems oddly reminiscent of a scenario familiar from suburban streets, featuring a number of council workers down a hole in the street, with a plastic barricade around them.

Meanwhile, Tim Watson in the same game, suggested of a runner acting on behalf of a coach: "He'd be giving them a message to get their structure behind the ball."

Yes, well, "structure" sounds better than American terms like "asses" or "heinies" in that context.

At the Hawthorn-Geelong game, 3AW's Nathan Brown was earmarking his place in commentary's future when he referred to a player's "panazz and panache". Frankly, once Nathan developed the masterstroke of combining the concepts of pizzazz and panache into the one term, he could have dispensed with the paltry components.

Ever the phrase-maker, Seven's Hamish McLachlan confirmed at the North-Crows match that: "Final drinks are being called at the Last Chance Saloon now."

The game doesn't get more over than that. That's over-er, if not over-est.

Perhaps no one has advanced the cause of football jargon as much as 3AW stalwart Tony Shaw, who recently, regarding matters of match review, reports and penalties for unavoidable high contact, highlighted the necessity for the AFL to "take a common sex approach". Almost any alternative might be preferable.